Resource for our Mental Load as Mothers
, by Carolina Isabel Gonzalez Hernandez
, by Carolina Isabel Gonzalez Hernandez
I'm sorry, but I can't make it...
This probably sounds familiar to you... that message you sent many times when you leave for a date overwhelmed and late. 📲
And sometimes it seems that You become a Mother and everything happens to you! 🤯
And in full anger with yourself, in this crazy self-demand that we mothers fall into, you fall into SELF ABUSEYes, the opposite of SELF CARE.
Because you are angry with yourself, you judge and reproach everything that is missing or you have stopped doing.
We see the glass half empty instead of half full... in our fight to want to be like before: planners and executors of everything we want, very strict with ourselves.
This reminds me that Motherhood is the most intense exercise in tolerance for frustration that I have ever experienced..
You get excited and plan, but something happens suddenly and everything changes radically... goodbye to your plan!
Like when you plan a vacation and a day before a virus knocks on your door…. So the trip is either canceled or the suitcase becomes a first aid kit for the current virus.
And you get angry with the situation and in full anger you lash out and guilt knocks on your door. And so you execute the perfect SELF ABUSE Plan.
So I have decided to use this opportunity to don't beat myself up anymore and start being tolerant with the most important person: WITH MYSELF.
This is the plan: ACTIONS TO BE IMPLEMENTED:
There are two actions:
1.- Mini SELF CARE session: Take a moment of at least 15 minutes that day to reconnect with myself. Here you can do the activity you enjoy the most but also make it simple to execute: listen to a song that encourages you, do a meditation session on YouTube, paint your nails, take a long, hot shower and even cry in the shower if you need to… I'm sure something can occur to you.
2.- List of achievements achieved: Make a list of that day's achievements (even if it's hard and they seem small).
If you are in the middle of postpartum and have a very small baby, even taking a shower can be an achievement for you…. which can also be an achievement if your little one is sick and has been on you all day... Making food, taking a shower, going for a short walk, tidying up something at home, having played with your little one and giving them some time of presence, etc. . etc
Connect with ourselves and practice gratitude (although it may sound like a truism) it can help us a lot!
Always We judge ourselves much worse than how we judge others..
If you dare you can bring a gratitude journal which does not require much time, ask me for the PDF HERE.
And little habit of gratitude consists in:
Make a list of at least 5 positive qualities in yourself (physical, spiritual, abilities, personal relationships, at work, family, friendship, skills, whatever you want) and 5 positive achievements in your life (if there are any). more, write more!)
I hope it helps you!
A hug, 🫶
Carolina 💜